Does anybody know what this means?

"The more we diversify the marketing spend, the more important it is to tie the attribution back to a purchase path."

(from DMNews, 12/14/09)

Man with knife in chest walked a mile to restaurant and ordered coffee

OK, this may not be techically stupid, but it's certainly weird.

Diners at a restaurant in Warren, Michigan got some strange entertainment with their meals on Sunday when a man walked in with a 5-inch knife stuck in his chest.

Police said that the man called 911 at about 10 p.m., saying he had been attacked in Warren but had just walked a mile to the Bray’s Hamburgers in Hazel Park.

Restaurant employee George Mirdita said the man walked in, ordered a coffee and said he was waiting for an ambulance to come. “It was like out of a movie,” Mirdita said. “It kind of freaked us all out here. Then, the customers realized it and they were all turning their heads in disgust.”

Police said the man told them he had been walking when another man approached him and demanded cash. The victim told police that he was stabbed when he refused to hand over any cash. The knife was shoved into the left side of his chest all the way to the handle.

Police said the man tried to get help at a nearby apartment complex, but when he couldn't get help, he called 911 from a pay phone.

“Yes ma’am, could uh … is it possible to send an ambulance here?” the man is heard saying to a 911 operator. “There’s a knife stuck in my chest.”
The man then told the operator that he thinks it’s a steak knife.

Mirdita said tha tthe man was calm and did not complain of being in pain. “he was mingling with the guy next to him,” he said.

The vistim was treated and is expected to be fine. (info from ClickOnDetroit)

A blatant commercial message:Flashing red Batphone can be delivered before Christmas

Now everyone can have a red phone with a flashing light like Batman.

In general, I write at night. My day job is running a company that sells a wide range of telecommunications products. We sell business phone systems, installation supplies and tools, phone accessories like headsets, and fun stuff like this Batphone, which I designed.

When there’s trouble in Gotham City, Police Commissioner Gordon calls caped crusader Batman, the secret alter ego of millionaire Bruce Wayne.

At Wayne Manor, the flashing red Batphone is answered by Alfred the butler, who tells Wayne about the trouble. Then Wayne and his young ward Dick Grayson put on their superhero costumes. As Batman and Robin, they race from the Batcave in the Batmobile to battle evil-doers, or rescue citizens in distress.

Now everyone can have a bright red flashing Batphone just like a superhero. When an emergency call -- or even an ordinary call -- comes in, a bright red light centered in a shiny chrome ring starts flashing to attract attention.

The Batphone has classic sixties styling, with heavy-duty construction, a two-year warranty, and is made in the USA. It gets all of its power from the phone line, and doesn’t require a power cord or batteries. It can work on an ordinary home phone line, or on an "analog extension port" in a business phone system.

The phone rings when the light flashes, unless a purchaser prefers the bell to be disconnected for silent signaling, or an optional high-pitched "BatSignal" or buzzer to be installed instead of the bell. Price with the bell is $122, including Priority Mail shipping to all 50 states.

Order online at www.GetABatPhone.com, or call toll-free 1-888-225-3999.

Teen titty flasher hit by car and fined by cops

An 18-year-old girl in Invercargill, New Zealand has been found guilty of disorderly behavior for flashing her breasts at passing cars. Cherelle Dudfield was hospitalized after a distracted driver ran into her. She pleaded guilty to the charge and was fined about $200.

The alcohol-fueled prank went awry when a car hit her as she tried to run to the side of the road. A police spokesman said, "She was extremely lucky as the vehicle had slowed because of her behavior. She rolled up onto the [hood] and cracked the [windshield]."

The prank occurred in the city center, where a ban on alcohol use is in force, he noted. (info from The Assocatd Press)

Drunk driver goes to jail after pissing on cop's head

Daniel Shilts of Waldo, Wisconsin urinated on a police officer during a fifth drunken driving arrest. He has been sentenced to a year in jail and three years probation.

Shilts was arrested in November 2008 after crashing into a pole at a gas station and then nearly backing up into a police car. That was after a police officer saw him drive in the parking lane and narrowly miss the curb while making several turns.

Shilts was taken into custody after failing field sobriety tests. On the way to the police station, he urinated in the back seat of the police car and also sprayed some urine through the center divider, striking the officer in the back of the head.

Shilts was convicted of felony counts of operating a vehicle while intoxicated and bail jumping. A felony count of expelling bodily substances at a public safety worker was among those dismissed as part of a plea agreement.

The judge also fined Shilts $3,599 and revoked his driver’s license for three years. (info from the Sheboygan Press)

Pot growers busted after reporting crop theft

Deputees in Hernando County, Florida arrested five people Tuesday after they reported that some of their marijuana plants had been stolen.

The deputies were responding to a home invasion report, and the people said that the suspects stole three to five pounds of pot. Deputies found 59 marijuana plants growing in the home, plus irrigation and ventilation equipment and other items used to grow pot.

All five suspects face charges of felony cultivation of marijuana. (info from Central Florida News)